Are there examples of chess games where the exact losing move has been found only with the help of engines?
Better still, games where the exact losing move cannot be found even by the best current engines?
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Sure, examples exist. E.g. Game 6 of Carlsen-Caruana, World Chess Championship 2018:
[FEN "5k2/8/5pK1/3B1P1P/3n4/8/3b4/8 w - - 6 67"]
As for games where the exact losing move cannot be found even by the best current engines - I spoke to a correspondence chess expert recently, and I'm confident they don't exist. Given a decisive game, an expert correspondence chess player will always be able to find the losing move, but it will not be trivial, and a lot of analysis is required.
Yes, but... Nobody will agree on all of them.
If two PERFECT computers played you could not tell the losing move or else it would be the first move. But I suspect a perfect game would be a draw.
The reason why moving loses is a myth is that the game is played by imperfect humans.
THE losing move is the next to last mistake. But what if a mistake confuses the opponent who resigns. What if the so called losing move wins this time but loses against another player in another game.
Except for the grossest of blunders it will be next to impossible to declare ONE move as THE losing move.